How can I think that time is limitless?
I know it’s not. I learned this early when I was diagnosed with breast cancer at a relatively young age. I was reminded of it when I lost my two best friends to the same disease. I knew it when other’s close to me died; a cousin’s young wife, more friends and acquaintances, and too many relatives.
And, on a lighter note, I knew it when I missed that recent 30%-off-everything-in -the -store sale by a day.
Not to sound morose, but our so-called window is closing a little more every day. And although we all know it – I know it – too many times we/I don’t really honor that knowledge. We think the window will always stay propped open, blowing in the same soothing timeless breezes.
Then why wasn’t I better about staying in touch with a dear friend who passed away last week? She did a Nora Ephron-type exit, in a way. I didn’t even know she had been ill with multiple myeloma for the past year. And although we kept up by email, somehow I think (perhaps erroneously) that if I’d made an effort to see her, the truth might have been revealed. I might have had a chance to say goodbye – to realize that even she – who had not one gray hair on her head and was more energetic and vibrant than many women half her age (she was 85) – was not immortal.
But she was always there. Until she wasn’t.
I am trying to learn from this….not to put things off, fooling myself into thinking there will always be another chance.
Because sometimes -many times – there isn’t.