Here’s a snippet of what Long Novels, Exhaustion, Worry, Stress, Anxiety, Insomnia, Doubt, Mood Swings and Tears are made of:
(photos.com)
- Realizing your children are never moving home again and your house is too empty, too big, too lonely, too expensive and too much work to justify staying in it.
- Making the decision to sell the house.
- Scheduling appointments with four real estate brokers to find the “ideal” one.
- Deciding on a price that is both realistic and fair while trying not to reminisce about how much money you’ve poured into the house over 17 years and trying not to take it personally when the broker tells you just because you love the acqua hand-made tile in the bathroom the buyer might want to rip it out (thus, to them, it could be rendered worthless).
- Getting the house ready to sell, which means not only putting a lot of “stuff” in storage but making it look like no one lives there, or if they do, they are at all times spotlessly clean, meticulously neat and miraculously absent whenever a real estate broker comes with a client, even if it is 9:00 AM on a Sunday morning or smack in the middle of dinnertime.
- Making sure you hide all your valuables because utter strangers will be walking through your house; but then again, who knows what’s valuable to someone with sticky fingers? (It could be the framed photo you took 10 years ago of the Golden Gate Bridge that used to sit propped up on your dresser.)
- Waiting anxiously for an offer when the same person comes back for a second, third and fourth look with their husband, their children, their parents and finally their in-laws…and you never hear from them again.
- Accepting the fact that even though you scrubbed and cleaned before a showing, someone is no doubt letting their young child run through your house, leaving their fingerprints on your polished piano (maybe even playing the piano) or in your medicine cabinet. And despite leaving shoe covers (the kind they wear in operating rooms) in a prominent spot near the door, realizing that people are not using them when you come home and see the remnants of tracked-in mud (or is it dog poop?) on your carpet (and you no longer own a dog).
- Seeing cars drive by very slowly, or even stopping and parking at the curb for indefinite periods of time and wondering if someone is casing your house and you should call the cops or if it’s just an interested buyer pondering the possibilities.
- Getting an offer. Negotiating the price and accepting the offer. Agreeing on a closing date. Putting a non-refundable deposit down on your new apartment, which you are beyond excited about. Hiring a mover (at least this bit is easy as you can hire someone like move on movers who do everything for you and make this stage an absolute breeze, at least). Packing. Calling the electric company, newspaper delivery, post office and all your other suppliers to inform them you’ll be moving. Getting excited about your move – finally! – which is just two weeks away.
- Receiving a call from your attorney telling you that the buyers were turned down for their mortgage and you won’t be moving after all.
- Losing your (sizable) deposit. Unpacking.
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Life goes on. You break your wrist. Put your dad in hospice. Resign yourself to another winter spent in the quiet, dark, snowy suburbs.
- Putting the house back on the market and starting all over again.
But here’s the so-called good news: WE’VE MOVED!!
We’ve finally moved and I’m so happy with our new place after spending so long looking at homes near charlotte and Cincinnati and pretty much all over the states until we found the perfect place! I know that some people really struggle when they are moving homes. There are so many things that they have to consider, such as the location of the property, if there are any local amenities etc… It’s not just the way the house looks or how big it is, when someone is moving they have to make sure that the house is right for them. If you are planning on moving soon, then you need to consider where it is you actually want to end up. If you are moving to somewhere like Cleveland Ohio then you will want to make sure that you get a place that is in that area, particularly if you are moving there for work. You could always check out these apartments for rent in Cleveland Ohio to give you a better idea of what you could get. However, the decision is up to you and obviously, you should make sure that you get the house that is right for you (with regards to size and location).
We are more than happy with the house that we got. The location is perfect and the size is just right. It felt like it was just meant to be and that all of the obstacles we had to overcome were all worth it. Even finding a way to transport our car to us was made easy, as all we had to do was to get in touch with a company similar to CarsRelo, (click here for more information) and they figured out everything for us. What was even better is that our car came back to us in perfect condition and it was a great way to start our new chapter in this home. But more about that as soon as I unpack some more cartons…
And in the meantime, if you want to read more about what it REALLY means to have an empty nest, you can click on over to my other blog, Midlife Matters, that I write for a wonderful website, healthywomen.org.
Sandra Gordon says
Love your post and can’t wait to read more once those boxes are empty.
SherylK says
Thanks, Sandy. I just need to pull myself away from the boxes in order to write the next post! Once you start unpacking, it’s hard to stop.
Kathy @ SMART Living 365.com says
Hi Sheryl….oh darn! I am so-o-o sorry to hear you had such a crappy experience the first go around with your house sale…it makes me doubly mad because IMHO a “good” agent would never, ever have let you put a deposit down on an apartment until after your buyer’s were approved for their loan!!!! (I know these things cuz I’m a licensed broker!!) In all the times I’ve moved (and it’s been lots!) I NEVER even pack until the buyer has loan approval. Anyway, I agree that selling and then moving is never fun–but do focus on the benefits!!! Once you get unpacked and settled and start enjoying your new place it will all be worth it….I can’t wait to hear some of your stories 🙂
SherylK says
Hi Kathy – Lesson learned. I fear hubby and I were a bit too anxious and got ready too quickly, not realizing that this could happen. Actually, we were ALL stunned – including both brokers.
I am already enjoying my new place (I’m trying hard NOT to notice all the boxes…)
Walker Thornton says
This is my future..I’m not quite ready but I need to downsize! Will look to your experience as I contemplate this!
SherylK says
Well, Walker, I wish you luck for your future endeavor. Hopefully your experience will go a lot more smoothly than mine did~
Irene S. Levine says
You are a role model! Congratulations~
SherylK says
I don’t know about that…I doubt anyone would want to go through what I did! Although, if they do, they can look at me and see that I am still (somewhat) in tact…
Irene S. Levine says
Despite adversity, you coped and caught the gold ring in the end!
Yes, that’s a role model~
SherylK says
Ah, I see. I like that way to look at it – thanks, Irene!
Nancy Monson says
This, unfortunately, sounds very familiar to me, Sheryl! Selling a house and moving sucks and is mega-stressful…but then you forget about it all. I hope you love your new place.
SherylK says
Yes, the process sucks, but like everything else, the memories will fade and the new ones will enter!
Rob K says
just about to embark on same. had the first broker in for an estimate on what our 15 year “palace’ is worth. happy stories about our neighbor’s house which sold in ONE day. maybe the broker priced it too low, y’know. problem around here is a tremendous shortage of rentals, particularly one that will take a doggy. And we compete with the local college student population, where landlords are used to charging 33% more than any reasonable person would pay for such a place. Can’t hardly wait for the next step……..
SherylK says
One day? Wow. Maybe you will have the same luck – hope so! Step by step, as the saying goes. Good luck to you in your new endeavor. Hope it goes more smoothly than ours did!
Shaun Hoobler says
Hi Sheryl! Cheers for this. Good post. I’m a new reader to your blog so I thought I’d just drop a quick thanks.
SherylK says
Thanks so much for writing, Shaun. Always nice to hear from new readers.
Amy Turner says
Wow, this is reality bites! I cam almost feel the joy of having moved myself into that new apartment. Hope you finally find the right buyer for your empty nest. Will be reading that piece, by the way, knowing I’d probably find some tips on how to combat lonely hours when there’s only the two of you.
Elizabeth Lee says
Sounds exhausting. Congratulations on surviving the process!
Brette says
We last moved 13 years ago and honestly it still gives me hives to think about it. I remember how agonizing it was to de-personalize the house and keep it spotless (while I had a 2 yr old, an 8 yr old and 2 dogs). We ended up renting our new house from the sellers for one month until the sale on our old house closed. It was all so nerve-wracking. I’m glad you’re through it and settling in.
Jane Boursaw says
Well yay for powering through all the changes and finally making the move! What a long haul (in more ways than one).
ruth pennebaker says
This brings back so many memories of our own move. There’s no easy way to do any of it. So glad you’ve powered through it.
Roxanne says
Having a house on the market and moving are the WORST, no matter the circumstances. Keep your chin up!
merr says
Congrats on your move! I love your list, too.
Absolute PRC says
One can say that selling a house is a rollercoaster ride. It is scary and one can get emotional about it but once you have completed the process, there is that sense of fulfillment that goes with it.
Cathy Chester says
You literally got me where I live. Is this what I have to look forward to? For now we’re putting it off until after the new year. I’m dreading it. My boys can’t wait. Oh well. I have to think about my after picture like the one you posted! Loved this, Sheryl. Number 13, however, also got me…
Pat says
Such a courageous step…I look forward to the next installment and more about your new place.